Currently, I am teaching 7th grade. I gotta say, I never thought I would love it as much as I do. I always thought I would fit best in a 4th or 5th classroom (you know, pre-hormonal kids). I didn't think I would be able to make connections with the kids. But, really, I connect with this age better than any other age group I've been with thus far. They keep me on my toes, that's for sure. They are hilarious, moody, and weird. I love it. Some days they frustrate me to no end, but most days I truly just enjoy my time with them.
They aren't like the younger kids, being that they don't tell me I'm "so pretty" or that they love me or anything like that, but they do love me and I them. They show their love in weird ways, like sarcasm, scowling, and grumbling. Seriously, at this age if they grumble at you, they feel comfortable with you. Not every teacher gets the grumbles. In short, I LOVE this group on good days and bad. They're my kids.
Most of my kids are growing up in very low income families in a lifestyle I've never experienced. They are used to being disappointed, hurt, and left by adults. I'm not willing to fall into pattern with that part of their lives. I am here for them. I love them very much. I have hope for them and push them to have hope for themselves. Most days, we work on it well together, but some days their hope is gone. Some days they come to school after a fight at home or after witnessing something that would knock me to my knees. Some days my kids cannot learn, because they have a million other thoughts running through their minds. Some days my kids, at age 12, are pushed harder than most adults and cannot be sweet and gentle all day. On these days, when one of my kids (or multiple) says something hurtful to me I have to remember that it is not out of resentment. A lot of times it is easier for us to lash out on people we know won't leave us. It's easier to say hurtful things to people we love and trust, because we trust they will still be there when we are done.
On days that my kids come to school ready to bulldoze the world, I cannot get upset when they say something hurtful to me. I think, for me, it is easy for me to see that they are hurting more in that moment than the words they are throwing at me. They are full of pain and so young but hormone crazed, that words just fly so easily. So, when those words are directed toward me, I just listen. I don't let it hurt me. I don't let it make me mad. I just listen. Soon enough, they'll calm down. I am a constant for my kids, and I refuse to leave because of hurtful words said by a hurting child.
Sincerely,
Miss
